When I was
a little child (because now I still am, with another adjective infront of child that I haven't discovered yet..)
I did my best to fight silence in every way.
I had panic of silence. Silence that lasted just a few seconds could make my heartbeat accelerate..
these days life teaches me silence
silence that results from too many thoughts that erase themselves in my head
I think constantly
constantly
I even think of my own emotions
When I see an old woman on the street I think about her life
When I see you I think about your thoughts
the one's you'll give me only with time
the one I do not have access to yet.

But lately . someone pressed the mute button.
and thoughts are silent
instead of rampaging violently around me

I .. guess I don't know. My brother once told me not to hold on violently to any moment or phase. Everything passes and just dies or changes and that's actually what should make life even more beautiful.
Maybe I take the process in my mind too serious . Maybe I take the melancholy too serious.
I should stand above the city again at some point
on a roof top maybe
and look down and see how many versions of life are happening comepletely independent of my own one
and realize how small I am
and realize how many possibilities there are

who knows..


novas

Self portrait


words , thoughts etc. greatly appreciated